14th day of the first month of the year Gui Mao Funeral Procession It is now the 15th day of the first month, February 5th. We are already on the train back to Inner Mongolia. It’s half-past midnight, feeling somewhat dazed yet somewhat awake. As we approach the destination, without any particular thought, I decided to write down this account. On the Gregorian calendar, it’s February 4th, the 14th day of the first lunar month, at half-past four in the morning....

12th day of the first month of the year Gui Mao Cremation At seven in the morning, we arrived in Shijiazhuang in the blink of an eye. Upon some reflection, I realized that the last time I came to Shijiazhuang was seven years ago. Back then, it was also because of a transfer, passing through Shijiazhuang. The subway in Shijiazhuang was newly built at the time, and the roads were heavily congested....

12th day of the first month of the year Gui Mao Commemorating the Departure of a Loved One I usually wake up around nine o’clock in the morning. At that time, sunlight would filter into my bedroom through two layers of windows. Yes, I sleep naked and don’t pull the curtains. In the early morning, or more precisely, in the morning, when I’m not fully awake, I seem to regress to my childhood: I used to worry about things that rarely happened, such as feeling like it’s the end of the world or fearing that my mother, who seemed frail, would leave me one day....

Saturday, January 28, 2023 Recent Conversations with My Uncle Recently, I’ve had many conversations with my uncle. Since childhood, my uncle and aunt have actually taken care of me a lot. I remember when I was young and got into trouble, my uncle and aunt were always there to intervene. Despite this, over the years, there hasn’t been much opportunity for extensive communication with them. Even during annual visits for Chinese New Year, it’s always brief and perfunctory, as if just going through the motions....

A Bunch of Mess in My Mind I just posted this on my Moments, knowing that no one will probably see it anyway. Lately, I’ve encountered many new people and new things. They have given me a lot of unrealistic fantasies and attempts, making me feel as though success is within reach on one hand, yet incredibly challenging on the other. Yes, recently I’ve entertained the idea of studying abroad. Not to mention the exorbitant tuition fees, just the vast amount of knowledge and skills required is enough to intimidate anyone, let alone the high tuition fees and difficult-to-grasp language…...